Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
