just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
