I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
