I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
