Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize