I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
