They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
