Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize