apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize