hotel room ftw
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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