Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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