I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
What drink are we having for lunch?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
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