At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
