Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
