I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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