apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize