she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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