The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
you never un-have a 4some
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
