yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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