then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
