You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
