i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
