No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
