i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
