It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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