So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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