At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
