She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Randomize
