Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
My ass is underappreciated
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
