Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
