Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
