two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
