THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
