When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
