grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
