i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
3pm strippers are depressing
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
