I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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