In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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