why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
