i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize