omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Randomize
