i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
