I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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