So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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