so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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