You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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