You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
