So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
3pm strippers are depressing
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Randomize
