I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
i drank out of a bidet.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
