I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
